Top Ten Signs of Holiday Over-eating…

In case you didn’t see the fake Christmas trees that sprang up at your nearest retailer like so many weeds in the past few weeks, you may not know that the holidays have rolled back around and are here again.

Now I think the term ‘roll’ is appropriate here, because the holidays almost always mean one thing:  I gain weight.  That’s right, no matter how often I vow to be good and stick to my ‘diet’ (and yes that’s spelled ‘die’ with a ‘t’ on the end…), the holidays are always my downfall.

Whether it is the turkey, the dressing, the mashed potatoes and gravy – you name it.  I can’t seem to resist it.  So listed below, in an effort to help others I am posting my personal “top ten” signs you might be focusing a bit too much on food this holiday season.

 10 – your friend points out you’ve got mistletoe stuck between your teeth (no, really I thought it was a garnish).

9 – Santa’s reindeer won’t come near your house for fear of being put on a roasting spit.

8 – every time you see Frosty the Snowman you start thinking of marshmallow cream.

7 – the only elves you know live in a tree and bake cookies for Keebler.

6 – sugar-plum fairies wouldn’t dare ‘dance through your head’ for fear of being dipped in chocolate.

5 – the snow-covered fields make you think of white buttercream frosting.

4 – you consider gravy to be the fourth food group.

3 – you spend all night dreaming about eating a giant marshmallow only to wake up and can’t find your pillow.

2 – the gingerbread men organize a resistance movement in your kitchen.

1 – you eat the fruitcake.

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2 Responses to “Top Ten Signs of Holiday Over-eating…”

  1. LOL! I do believe you’ve got the makings of a great Christmas carol here: The 10 Follies of the Holidays! Well done. 🙂

  2. Thanks! I’ve really got to get back on the diet wagon… if I get any bigger I’m going to need my own zip code!

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